provider

just as the caregiver role—as the primary option—has limited, dehumanized, and oppressed some women, the provider role—as the primary option—has limited, dehumanized, and oppressed some men. Men bring home more bacon than women, but many of them consider the economic benefits associated with their gender to be a mixed blessing. The notion that "it's a man's world" has obscured the fact that along with benefits have come severe lifestyle restrictions, stress, economic pressures and responsibilities, unrealistic social expectations, and being judged by criteria not applied to women. As more women providers join men in taking on toxic workloads, personal and societal goals may need to be re-evaluated to help fashion a more life-giving balance between work life and non-work life. The following words are theoretically inclusive, but we use them largely to penalize men for not being providers or "good enough" providers: also-ran, born loser, deadbeat, derelict, do-nothing, down-and-outer, dud, failure, freeloader, goldbricker, good-for-nothing, hard-luck case, idler, layabout, lazybones, lightweight, loafer, mooch, ne'er-do-well, nonstarter, parasite, piker, prodigal, schlemiel, schmo, shirker, skinflint, slacker, sponge, washout, wastrel. Traditionally, a male "loser" is a financial failure—someone who can't "provide"; a woman who is a "loser" fails to be sexually attractive. See also breadwinner, bum, male privilege, success object.