Alphabetical Entries: K

in Germany, this expression is sex-neutral, referring to informal social gatherings of both sexes. In the United States, however, it has been used to belittle gatherings of women (U.S. men do not have kaffeeklatsches). The term is much less popular in recent years; people use instead get-together, tea, coffee, coffee break, social hour, visit, talk, open house, party.

Xhosa. Eschew the offensive, derogatory, confrontational slur for a black person (used principally in South Africa, but on occasion in the U.S.); it comes from the Arabic for "infidel" and is roughly equivalent to "nigger" (Sanford Berman, Prejudices and Antipathies).

there's nothing wrong with using "kaiser roll" for the crusty bread with poppy seeds and distinctive crown-like appearance, but it is, strictly speaking, a male-linked term; introduced at the 1873 World's Fair in Vienna, it was named after the kaiser, Emperor Franz Joseph. If you want an alternative use Vienna roll, hard roll, hamburger roll. See also sex-linked expressions.

referring to South Sea Islanders or Hawaiians of Polynesian descent, this term is derogatory and unacceptable when used by outsiders.

choir/orchestra conductor/director/leader.

this pejorative is used primarily for white women displaying entitlement, or arrogantly, unreasonably, and often racistly using their (assumed) privilege to get their way. It has also been used of several men. University of Virginia media researcher Meredith Clark says the idea of a white woman of whom Black people need to be leery "has always been there; it just hasn't always been so specific to one person's name." As a slur, avoid it. As poor writing, avoid it: (1) not everyone will grasp the allusion; (2) a number of "Karens" have been seen over the past centuries, e.g., "Becky," "Miss Ann," "Susan," and this one may not last either; (3) describing behavior is more effective.

this former Soviet republic decided to drop the letter "h" from its name at one point but has since switched back. The people of Kazakhstan are Kazakhs, and the adjectival form is Kazakh.

keelboater, keeler, keel/barge worker.

office temporary. In any case, "Kelly Girl" is a registered trademark; use only for someone who works for Kelly Services, Inc. (The firm was known as the Kelly Girl Service only from 1957 to 1966.) See also girl (referring to a woman).

kennel owner/operator/attendant, dog breeder.

this term is highly offensive because of the woman's supposed passivity (she is "kept") and because of the lack of a word to describe her partner. Although two people are involved, only one is labeled pejoratively—or even labeled at all. The assumption is that the man is behaving "normally" and thus is still just a man, while the woman's behavior (no different in important respects from his) is "deviant" enough to require a special term. In the 1980s, Estée Lauder president Leonard Lauder decided against buying advertising space in Ms. Magazine because its readers weren't right for his product; Estée Lauder sells, he explained, "a kept-woman mentality." When Gloria Steinem pointed out that 60% of his customers worked, he said, yes, but they would like to be kept. It is not known whether this insight into the female mind was based on market research or something else. See also gigolo.

key person/individual/executive, linchpin, number one, numero uno, leading character, leader, chief, chief cook and bottle washer, pivotal person, cornerstone, focal point, axis, heart, prop, center, main ingredient, vital part. Consider using "key" alone as an adjective or noun: she's absolutely key to the project, he's the key to this transaction. Or, choose an appropriate adjective: crucial, critical, pivotal, essential, vital, indispensable. The insurance industry uses "key man" when insuring the top executive. If you need to use the term, put it in quotation marks.

a Japanese American (usually born to immigrant parents) who is educated chiefly in Japan.

this widely used informal term is generally acceptable, but occasionally it can be demeaning. If you need an alternative, consider child, girl/boy, young people, young woman/young man, youth, youngster; student, pupil.

see ethnic slurs.

rotary-kiln operator, kiln worker/supervisor, annealer.

the "children, kitchen, and church" slogan was used by the Nazis to confine women to their supposed biological roles. The phrase has since been used by various groups to describe women's "rightful place." Many women do, in fact, find deep satisfaction in children, kitchen, and spirituality. The problem arises when applying this "ideal" to every woman, just because and only because she is a woman.

chief, main, top, leading; large, largest, outsize.

use when it is the correct formal title. For example, in 1644, Christina was proclaimed king, not queen, of Sweden. Otherwise, consider using monarch, ruler, sovereign, crowned head, majesty, regent, chief of state, leader, governor, chieftain, potentate, commander, protector; autocrat, tyrant, despot, dictator; figurehead. In religious writings, sovereign is often used for God as King. For its meaning as a superlative, use best, top, expert, superstar, boss, chief, leading light, dean, mogul, nabob, tycoon, high-muck-a-muck, big wheel, big cheese.

everyone wears a crown in their own castle (see singular "they"); we are all kings and queens in our own castles; in our own castle, each of us wears a crown; aboard our own ship each of us is captain; we are all rulers in our own castles; I am monarch of all I survey; home is where the heart is.

not to be used as a metaphor, for example, for a tall black basketball player, no matter how complimentary you might think it is. One longtime radio broadcaster was suspended for using it.

or, queen of the hill/mountain. Other possibilities: big wheel, bigwig, magnate, someone on the top of the heap, monarch of all they survey.

although this term refers to the lion (also known as "king of the beasts"), you may want sex-neutral choices when referring to someone powerful: star, superstar, mogul, nabob, boss, tycoon, high-muck-a-muck, leading light, luminary, chief, boss; top dog, big shot, wheel, big wheel.

specific architectural term with no substitute; leave as is.

Chinook/Quinnat salmon.