Why setting boundaries is imperative to my activism

I have always loved making other people happy. It’s a big reason why I started news reporting — I enjoy helping others tell their stories. It’s also why, the summer before I was a senior in high school, I became very active in the fight for student press freedom. I wanted to preserve the ability of all student reporters to do the work we all care so much about. 

As rewarding as this work was, though, I quickly found I wasn’t prepared for the demands of lobbying. Our legislative movement in Texas is grassroots, which means we’re trying to reach students all across a large, politically conservative state. This has meant skipping a lot of class for last-minute traveling, pulling all-nighters to prepare testimonies and information packets for legislators, and hopping on plenty of phone calls to gather supporters or dispute those who oppose our bill. And there’s a time limit to this work because we are one of the four states in the U.S. that is biennial, meaning we can only pass bills every two years. 

But even as the work began to wear me down, I still wanted to do everything I could to push the cause further. Always having too much on my plate and sacrificing my well-being for activism became my new normal. I wasn’t sleeping, was always sick from traveling, and consumed more caffeine than I did food. Still, I brushed it off, telling myself that I should be grateful for having a prominent voice, and these were just things that came with fighting for a cause.

It took several months for me to realize what I was doing to myself. By then, I was already experiencing burnout. I was physically and emotionally exhausted the day our bill timed out last legislative session. I remember feeling guilty when a lot of people told me I was a role model for them because I knew I could not continue my work if I was completely depleted. 

A few months ago, I stumbled across an article about boundaries. The term honestly scared me. I told myself that, by definition, boundaries limit an area —so how could something so limiting help me succeed? Then, I came across another article that explained the impact weak boundaries could have on someone. It listed things like continually questioning yourself, having one-sided or toxic relationships, and having a poor self-care routine as a result of a lack of firm boundaries. I realized I resonated with almost every single item on the list. It was jarring. 

I then began to bury myself in research about the different kinds of boundaries, such as those related to someone’s space, time, and energy. These could be as simple as physically taking a few steps away from someone on a bus when you aren’t comfortable, or saying no to a work opportunity when you need time to yourself. I also learned about the positive effects boundaries have in workspaces, relationships, and self-care routines like more self-respect, flexibility, and the avoidance of compromising my time for other people.

As simple as it may sound to implement those things in one’s life, I’ve found the prevalent stigma around mental illness and self-care can cause people — like me! — to avoid doing them altogether. To enforce these boundaries in my own life, therefore, I started small. I apologized less frequently in my workplace, made time for breakfast no matter if I had a meeting or an extensive to-do list, took my first mental health day when I felt overwhelmed again and shared my feelings with loved ones instead of bottling them up. 

These small steps have had a significant impact. Now, I not only rely on those components to help take on my schedule day-by-day, but I have also been adding onto them based on what my mind and body need. Things like temporarily deleting my e-mail and/or messaging apps and implementing daily meditation have helped me feel empowered again.

At the same time, setting these boundaries is a work in progress, and I continue to fight the cycle of burnout. There are still days where I feel guilty about saying no or overload my schedule because it was instinctive for so long. Keeping healthy boundaries is by no means easy, but I recognize that to keep fighting for what’s important to me, I must fight for myself first.