Escaping Imposter Syndrome

By the fourth week of my first semester of college, fatigue, stress, panic, and an overwhelming sense of inferiority had set in. The pressure to excel academically, challenge myself with extracurriculars, and balance a healthy social life was burdensome — especially as a woman of color who has always felt the need to prove myself within academic institutions.

I spent that first semester comparing myself to a misconstrued interpretation of my seemingly flawless classmates’ presentations of their academic lives on social media. After swiping through TikTok or Instagram and seeing others post their picture-perfect study routines and day-in-the-life vlogs, I felt very inadequate.

I can only articulate this as a feeling of drowning. The desperation to escape from my feeling of unworthiness was similar to the struggle of climbing aboard a small life raft that was drifting deeper into the abyss of the ocean. Lurking in the depths of the water was a monster that began to chip away at my self-esteem. At first, I thought the monster was haunting just me but, after shining a light on it, I realized that it was a public nuisance, harassing anyone who crossed its path.

What is this monster? It’s called “imposter syndrome,” which the Oxford Dictionary describes as the persistent inability to believe that one’s success is deserved or has been legitimately achieved as a result of one’s efforts or skills.

Social media has glamorized unsustainable lifestyles. There are thousands of YouTube videos and TikToks that detail how to study for long hours without getting tired, become a more fun person to be around, and glow up before summer break. This project of self-improvement is specific for women, too: The expectation seems to be that women should be clever but not deceitful, athletic but not muscular, sexy but not sleazy, ambitious but not overbearing, and successful but not boastful. I attempted to navigate these social expectations before realizing that it was impossible to obtain the body of the supermodels on Fashion Nova, study for 12 hours a day, and spend every night partying with friends.

I only realized that my friends were also facing similar emotions because I was no longer able to hide how miserable I had become. After reaching a breaking point, a wave of emotions rushed over me and a friend asked me a simple, yet infuriating question: Are you OK? Of course, just hearing this question led to a flow of uncontrollable tears. When my friend attempted to console me she also revealed that she was struggling with similar emotions.

It was comforting to realize that I was not alone in my struggles to keep up with the societal pressures of perfection. Feeling undeserving and insignificant was not exclusive to my personal experience. According to the American Psychological Association, up to 82% of people have experienced imposter syndrome.

The American Psychological Association also states that sharing feelings of unworthiness can reduce loneliness and allow those who are experiencing negative emotions to hear positive attributes about themselves. Accounts like this and my own experience have made me realize how important it is to confide in friends and family, not fearing vulnerability, as it is highly likely that those around you are going through the same thing.

In understanding that platforms such as Instagram and TikTok do not give us an accurate depiction of others, we can stop viewing the content that we see on social media as realistic and instead utilize it as a source of fictitious entertainment. In doing so, we can limit feelings of insignificance and become vulnerable enough to relay any feelings of inferiority that may accumulate.

I am not attempting to dissuade anyone from engaging in social networking, therefore. Instead, I hope that by acknowledging that the content posted on these platforms is often disingenuous, we can reduce feelings of insignificance and encourage each other to openly communicate when experiencing self-doubt. Only then will we be able to collectively aid in uplifting each other.