A Letter to Black Girls: Watch Out For Certified Dangerous Men

After decades of abuse, R. Kelly has finally been convicted of sex trafficking and racketeering. Meanwhile, Drake’s new album, “Certified Lover Boy— which samples R. Kelly’s music on “TSU” — continues to top the charts.

The verdict in the R. Kelly case is a victory for survivors of sexual violence, in particular Black girls whose voices and stories of trauma have gone unheard for far too long. Yet, “justice” feels like too strong a word because it’s long overdue. These young women not only have endured their own experience but have had to watch this man continue to harm other Black girls and avoid accountability time and time again. They were re-traumatized by the silence, complicity, and inaction of public agencies, media, and more even as evidence mounted against R. Kelly.

Drake, like many others, is complicit in R. Kelly’s crimes. His choice to include R. Kelly sends a strong message of disregard for survivors’ experiences despite his producers' attempt to excuse him by saying that they were forced to credit R. Kelly for legal reasons

This is coming from a 33-year-old artist who has a history of texting famous teen artists like Billie Eilish and Millie Bobby Brown and who has touched at least one underage girl at one of his concerts in inappropriate ways. Similar to the longstanding and widespread indifference to R. Kelly’s history with underage girls, being silent about Drake’s suspicious relationship with young girls could be history repeating itself.

Black girls deserve more. We are writing this letter to us because we have always deserved better than what we have received.

For artists like R. Kelly and Drake to behave this way and be able to scurry around accountability is perpetuating a culture of harm doing that extends far beyond the music industry. It perpetuates the normalization of rape culture, and we see that violence rearing its ugly head when we are sexually abused, when trans women and girls are murdered, and when we have to endure daily sexual taunts on the streets. You cannot separate the artist from his music anymore.

And that violence is also nuanced. The misogynistic choices of these artists render us disposable and vulnerable to harm because music, like other forms of popular culture, informs how we are perceived and treated. It says that our bodies are here to be objectified and for the pleasure of men. It condones sexual and gender violence and minimizes our value.

Drake dedicated “TSU” to Black girls at Southern Texas University, but we should all refuse to accept the role of muse if it is meant to distract us by buying our adoration and complicity. It’s music like this that wants us to believe that we will be loved and valued only when we conform to the desires of these men.

Every time we speak out against the deliberate actions of men like Kelly and the support of those actions and suspicions of similar actions of men like Drake, we are showing ourselves and the world our inherent value. We are saying we have value because we exist. We are defining and sharing our beauty and brilliance on our own terms.

And it’s up to us to share what we know with younger generations of cis and trans Black girls. We don’t have to chastise them for listening to the music, but we can encourage them to be critical and help them understand the playbook of men like Drake and Kelly. Unfortunately, there are many more like them.

Most importantly, we must own our power now more than ever. We know the immense influence we have over culture because Black women are the culture.

Culture and attitude must shift to a place where cis and trans Black women and girls always feel safe, where we are given credit for our immeasurable contributions and we are valued for who we are. We have to do that for ourselves because history has taught us that no one else will but us.

This means not giving a pass to dangerous men and saying no to a world intent on gaslighting our experiences.

Ashley Newenle is a Girls for Gender Equity Young Women's Advisory Council alumn based in New York City. They're a sophomore at the City College of New York and engage in political commentary from the Black queer perspective.

Oluwatobi Oluwagbemi is a freelance writer based in Minnesota. She is a graduate of International Relations and Women's Studies from St. Cloud State University and is interested in policy/systems change. She changes culture by writing about her lived experiences.

Girls for Gender Equity (GGE) is an intergenerational grassroots organization committed to the physical, psychological, social, and economic development of girls and women. Through education, organizing, and healing justice work, GGE encourages communities to remove barriers and create opportunities for girls and women to live self-determined lives.